Thursday, May 28, 2009

Fan of the Month!

We can't head into June and kickoff the summer until we honor everything good and glorious about May:

--Horse racing
--NBA playoffs
--The resurrection of swimwear
--May's Fan of the Month

Congratulations to Jerry in Memphis! Without further adieu, here's my Q&A with a very special Fan of the Month...

May's Fan of the Month

Name?
Jerry

Age?
29

Where y'at?
Memphis, in the water.

Something the average interweb browser wouldn't know about me is…?
"Me" being you or "Me" being me? "Me" being you, that you absolutely never kid, in a scary way, about "Laguna Beach". "Me" being "Me" that I never kid, in an awesome way, about "Two A-Days.”

Also, I have regrets. Involving a Geography Bee.

(Editor's Note: It's true. Chris is convinced that Season 1 of Laguna Beach was one of American television's crowning achievements. If you can't unironically enjoy that show, he'll probably throw a punch at you. I live in fear of the day he turns in 6,000 words on the Stephen-Kristin-LC love triangle and I have to quit my job.)

The music scene in Memphis is…?
Very, very good. Inclusive in terms of musical diversity, deep in talent, but a little exclusive in terms of venues/crowd/participating areas in town/hip quotient but I think from the inside-out and the outside-in, that's changing a bit... At least I hope.

Whatcha do for a living?
Grad student.

When was the last time you ate at Burger King?
Early May. I'm going to say it was a Thursday.

What on earth did you get at Burger King?
I think it was a Whopper, no lettuce, no tomato. And fries. The fries sucked.

Your last meal on earth has to be ordered at a fast food establishment (national chain). What do you get?
Padma Lakshmi - I'll have what she's having

What music publications/blogs/sites do you read? Any of them good?
Rolling Stone has been getting better, though maybe not necessarily in its music writing as much as its feature writing in general, any way, I've bought and read 2 of the last 3 issues, and I don't think I have done that in 10 years.

Backroads of American Music (at times), $5 Cover, this one, the Ardent Sessions stuff, Oxford American music issues (once a year), Lefsetz Letter (more industry related).

They're all good, but it's interesting what Rolling Stone has decided to commit (recommit?) itself to these days, though I think your point about their predictability with music features/news/reviews is still valid.

What was the exact date you became a Chris Milam fan?
When was your first youth group show with the Styrofoam Giraffes?

Right now there are only Milam CDs, shirts, and stickers. What obscure
item of Milam merchandise would you like to see sold (e.g., Milam dog
sweaters, Milam grill covers, etc.)?
Toupees

Of the late 90's ridiculous boy bands, which was the best? Is there a best? Can a best exist? Ten years later, is it possible that any of them were important?
98 degrees and all lesser bands, including O-Town, were a waste of time except for cautionary tales against aligning yourself with some constricting label deal and/or a manager that may or may not be Jabba the Hut.

Backstreet Boys kicked the door in (the Nirvana of boy bands? YES! SACRILEGE!), NSync was the most consistent, and have spun off one person with a career. Is Justin Timberlake more Scott Weiland (and Nsync STP) or Chris Cornell (to their Soundgarden)? Or does his post boy band career/lack of rehab stints trump them too much and thus destroy the analogy? Probably the latter.

And no, they weren't important. Unless somehow this changes child labor practices on Kids Incorporated.

(Editor's Note: How dare you malign O-Town, sir.)

Pick your dream concert. Any three (living) artists, anywhere, any venue, any month/time of day. What is it? What's it called?
Levon Helm and his Band, Pearl Jam, My Morning Jacket in a barn on a Friday night in October. The barn is in Blacksburg, Virginia.

It's called "OK I Can Die Now."

If you could fight any public figure, who would it be and why?
Pau Gasol. Have you seen Pau Gasol?

Second Place: Probably Vertical Horizon.

Would you fight dirty?
I lack reach (comparatively), so yes.

You get to bring one weapon. What is it?
A Marc Gasol bobblehead. Or a beard trimmer.

Rank these items in order of awesomeness: BBQ, 1994 (the year), Jesus, Marisa Miller, Smoky Robinson.
1) BBQ,
2) Jesus
3) Marisa Miller
4) 1994
5) Smokey Robinson.

Fill in the blanks!

Five favorite artists from the 60's are…?
Beatles, Band, Bob Dylan, Byrds, and (dammit I can't justify another B) Otis Redding

Five favorite artists from the 90's are…?
Pearl Jam, Nirvana, REM (hope this counts for 90s), Radiohead, and Outkast

Five favorite artists from the 2000's are…?
Lucero, My Morning Jacket, Kings of Leon, Green Day (2000s incarnation), White Stripes

Some other singer/songwriters I love are… ?
Cory Branan, Chris Milam, Lyle Lovett, Emmylou Harris, Tom Petty, Tom Waits, Stevie Wonder, Isaac Hayes, Patty Griffin, Smoky Robinson

...is my favorite Beatle.
I refuse to answer this question as it is against my religion.

Against your religion? You rank BBQ ahead of Jesus. Why would BBQ preclude you from having your own Beatles hierarchy?
Because BBQ works as a perfect combination of perfect ingredients, and so did the Beatles. I believe in that.

...is my least favorite Beatle.
George.

Favorite wrongly-heard song lyric is...? (e.g. "Excuse me while I kiss this guy...")
"Gag me/Gag me/I ain't eatin' that stuff." --CCR, "Fortunate Son"

You are going out tonight. You are going out to do whatever it is you would like to do for a fun night of festivity and frivolity. This can include anything from knitting a scarf to writing your Congressman to cockfighting in Columbia. Anyway, you get to assemble your posse for the night. You can pick ANY FOUR MEN OR ANY FOUR WOMEN on the planet, friends, celebrities, athletes, etc. Who is in your entourage and why?
I'd go with my friends but that's the boring answer so for the other answer let's go:
Jack Nicholson, Charles Barkley, George Clooney, Loretta Lynn.

They all are funny, and probably have great stories I would love to hear about things I will never be involved with: Hollywood, pro sports, music. They can drink, but don't have to be the center of attention (though I have my doubts about Chuck). I imagine (and since this is imaginary, that's what counts) we could sit in a corner somewhere, drink, and I wouldn't have to talk much. Plus, not only is Loretta Lynn amazing, funny, and in possession of many great stories, she would probably make the boys be on their best behavior and keep others, wherever we are, from being assholes or wanting to horn their way into our group (that, and Jack's crazy). She's the perfect addition, plus she tempers everything that the other three guys might mess up. And she could maybe set me up with Emmylou Harris.

(Editor's Note: It's weird that the readers of this space have answered everyone from Terrell Owens to Loretta Lynn. The lesson, as always: I know nothing.)

I'm thinking of subbing Clooney out, but he's handy because he's the most likely to just fly everyone to Italy at the drop of a hat. He seems game for anything without being overly spontaneous (I have moderate surprise tolerance), so that's comforting. Okay, he can stay...

Where will music be in 5 years? What will be the next "big thing"? Where would you like to see it go?
I don't know how much change we'll see in the next 5 years, except maybe a growing touring focus for some, and songwriting for others.

The next big thing will depend on how/where people listen to music. If it's still iPod-related, then you'll probably still hear bands/singers/songs that seem to fit the my-own-personal-sweeping-sentimental-soundtrack mold that's been going on. Maybe that'll sound different, but I just don't know where it will swing to otherwise...

(Editor's Note: The Blog's covered "lifestyle music" pretty extensively.)

I'd like to see two things:
1) More A&R and a development system for more artists outside or inside of the major label system (if they can adjust accordingly).
2) More local scenes incubate to operate independent of industry towns, and achieve a level where the artists can have music be their day job because they've found a way to make money without moving to NYC, LA or Nashville. Touring would still be a part of it, but more songwriting, recording and distribution maintained in these scenes, whether as part of a label structure or independent of it.

I think local scenes will get more self-sufficient, like you're predicting. But does this pave the way for one city to change the game nationally (aka, "the new Seattle")? Or, instead, ten different cities with their own unique scene but a fraction of the influence? In other words, can there be a "new Seattle" in the 21st century?
I guess some would say Portland in the past couple of years is as much the new Seattle as a city can be, so that assumes a lesser influence. I think it's just as likely that the "new Seattle" won't necessarily be a sonic impact for a city but maybe more of a business model impact. A game changer for the music industry, rather than a new taste maker. It seems that there is more of an opportunity to have the biggest impact in that way, rather than a wave of one sound replacing another. But what do I know? Not a thing.

Finally, how can I ever thank you for the support?
More music, and see if you can arrange for me, Jack Nicholson, Charles Barkley, George Clooney and Loretta Lynn to all hang out.

Done. Maybe.

--CM

(Note: If you'd like to be a future Fan of the Month, just drop me a line with "FOM" in the subject.)

1 comment:

Michael said...

I still have recordings of the "styraphome" giraffes.

All time fave - "polaris man." How could a song about an automated pool cleaner living in a pool in a Germantown backyard not be amazing?

Maybe it has a spot on a future Milam B-sides album?

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