Monday, September 06, 2010

Fan of the Month!

Me and Julio--down by the schoolyard.
It's here! 

Fall's finally here.  College football's arrived, the NFL's on its way, new music abounds, it's 80 degrees and sunny, golden unicorns prance in the meadow, and all is right with the world.  Before you know it, Starbucks will feature pumpkin-based drinks, my cider shipments from Michigan will arrive, and I won't know what to do with myself.  It's the season of everything that I love, and all of it, and all of the time. 

I love September.

So it's only fitting that September's Fan of the Month captures the spirit of the season.  She is a cornucopia of soul and spunk.  She's equal parts hospitality and hostility, sweetness and snark.  She has three nicknames, eighteen different last meals, and an encyclopedic knowledge of September's goofy holidays.  Her cup overfloweth.  She makes the case that you can never have too much of a good thing.

She's the one, the only...

September's Fan of the Month, Allyson in Memphis!

Let's learn a little more about her with the now-infamous FOM Questionnaire:

(If you'd like to be a future FOM, just drop me a line with "FOM" in the subject.  I promise all emails are read and much appreciated!)

Allyson/Alter Ego Suzanne /Ally to those under the age of 12.


Where y'at?  

Allyson's dog never pays full price for late pizza.
Something the average interweb browser wouldn't know about me is…?  
I own a dog that apparently looks like the sensei rat from Ninja Turtles.

(Editor's Note: That would be Splinter.)

The music scene in Memphis is…? 
A hodgepodge.  It has a little bit of something for everyone.

Whatcha do for a living?
Let's go with Banker.

(Editor's Note: Weird how she capitalized that.  I'm getting flashbacks to Oregon Trail where you chose your occupation and always picked "Banker" so you could start with more money.  Suddenly I'm hungry for buffalo.)

When was the last time you ate at Burger King?  
Three weeks ago: cini-minis and an egg/cheese croissanwich.  Don't judge me.  Breakfast is the most important meal.

You have one meal left in life but it has to be fast food.  You can pick and choose different items from different joints.  Name that meal!
Wendy's fries with a Frosty for dipping, Double Stack (cheese only), BK chicken fries, a chocolate chip cookie from Lenny's, and a Cherry Slurpee from That Place In the Mall.

(Editor's Note: Wait, is she saying she dips her fries into her Frosty?)

Dipping sauce?
Wait, are you saying you DIP YOUR FRIES into your Frosty?  
Oh, this just makes me sad because it can only mean you've never tried this.  Yes, and trust me: it is fabulous.  Once you try it, you never go back.

You have one meal left in life, period.  Name that meal!  
Ricotta stuffed shells made by Mom.  A huge pot of Italian gravy, penne with creamy pomodoro sauce, and cheesy potatoes all made by my one of my best friends and best chefs ever Bill Swanger.  Also, anything else he feels like making.  And homemade Rice Krispy treats.

What music publications/blogs/sites do you read? Any of them good? 
Chris Milam will be the first.  I'll get back to you on the second part of this question....

Pick your dream concert. Any three (living) artists, anywhere, any venue, any month, any time of day. What is it? What's it called?  
Titled "Lil Bit O' Ever'thing."  Madonna (early songs only), Alison Kraus & Union Station (with special appearance by Robert Plant), and Michael Buble.   October at night in Bryant Park (closed for just me and invited friends).

(Editor's Note: This is interesting--Allyson's like the fifth consecutive FOM to make her dream concert performed for only her and her friends.  Seems everyone loves concerts, but everyone hates everyone else at concerts.)

You can pick one album as your morning alarm for a year.  The songs and their “wake-up” segments will shuffle randomly, but you are stuck with this album for a full year.  What is it?
Norah Jones, Feels Like Home.

If you could fight any public figure, who would it be and why?
Spencer Pratt.  The "why" should cover itself with the name alone.

I follow Spencer on Twitter and I'll be honest: he's kind of hilarious.  Still want to fight him?  And if so, who wins?  Remember, we've actually seen Spencer fight.   
Yes, because anyone who calls himself "King Spencer" and needs to compare himself against "The Situation" really needs a smack in the mouth.  I am going with me only because 1) I'm Irish and 2) I know I would sink to ankle biting.

(Editor's Note: Is now a bad time to mention I like "The Situation," too?)

Fill in the blanks!

Five favorite artists from the 60's are…?
CCR, Sam & Dave, Beatles, Etta James, Simon &Garfunkel.

Five favorite artists from the 90's are…?
Dave Matthews Band, Garth Brooks, Lenny Kravitz, Sheryl Crow, Hootie & the Blowfish.

The soul patch should've given it away.
You loved Garth Brooks in the 90's.  Did you buy the Chris Gaines album?  If so, did you like it? 
Chris who? (They say if you just pretend it never happened you can make it like it never really happened.)

(Editor's Note: Yep. Like Godfather 3, Friday Night Lights Season 2, and the Mike Shula Era at Alabama.)

Five favorite artists from the 2000's are…?  
Sugarland, JT, Gwen Stefani, Kelly Clarkson, Green Day.

Some more singer/songwriters I love are…?  
Well, Chris Milam of course. my favorite Beatle.
Going to have to go with John. my favorite adjective in the English language.  

Would you characterize yourself as snarky?  Do you like snarky people more?  Or you just like the sound of the word? 
Personally, no, I would not say I am snarky, but others may contest that.  If others receive snarkiness and I happen to find the snarkiness funny then yes, I do like snarky people more.   And yes, I like the sound, too--it's British.

Know any adjectives from other languages?  
Several in Spanish.

What's "several" in Spanish?  (Ba-dum-cha!  I'll be here all night!)
La palabra para "several" in Espanol es varios.  (o varias si la palabra es femenina)

(Editors' Note: Anyone want to translate that for me?  I have a feeling it was snarky.) my favorite month of the year.  
October. my least-favorite month of the year. 

Favorite wrongly-heard song lyric is...? (e.g. "Excuse me while I kiss this guy...")  
The classic mistaken CCR lyric, "there's a bathroom on the right."

(Editor's Note: From CCR's "Bad Moon Rising," the official lyric is "there's a bad moon on the rise.")

Favorite rock album of the Oughts?
Let's go with Green Day's American Idiot.

Favorite non-rock album of the Oughts?
Sugarland, Love On the Inside.

Favorite movie (you can pick separate ones for comedy and drama)?  
Sliding Doors.

Favorite TV show (you can pick separate ones for comedy and drama)?  
Picking from what is still on and not cancelled: Modern Family and Criminal Minds.  And since reality was not an option I will add it and list Biggest Loser.

John Slattery: better than ginger ale.
Rank these items in order of awesomeness: The Beatles' Revolver, John Slattery, jousting, fantasy football, philanthropy, ginger ale, the collected works of Ernest Hemingway. 
1) John Slattery
2) Ginger ale
3) Beatles Revolver
4) Philanthropy
5) Jousting
6) Collected works of Hemingway
7) Fantasy football

My fantasy football team name this year is Spare Me The Stirrups.  What would yours be? 
Hold Me Closer, Tony Danza.

I ranked all twelve months a while back.  Where would September be in your rankings (1 being best)? 
September is probably 4th.

On a scale of 1 to "The Way Chris Feels About Football," how much do you like football?  
Since I really don't know how you quantify a number between 1 and "endless, boundless, limitless, world without end love," I would have to go with...13.

(Editor's Note: I love her, Chris.  She's the best.)

I did a "Monthly Playlist" throughout 2009, and have taken a brief hiatus.  I need your help.  Give me 5 "Songs for September."
The Theme: September Holidays and Special Days.
1) Baha Men, "Who Let the Dogs Out" (in honor of Barkley the dog from Sesame Street's birthday)
2) Donna Summer, "She Works Hard For the Money" (for Labor Day)
3) Fats Domino, "Blueberry Hill" (for National Blueberry Popsicle Day)
4) Elvis Presley, "Teddy Bear" (for Teddy Bear Day)
5) "Fresh Prince of Bel Air Theme" (for Will Smith's Birthday)

You can move anywhere in America for six months.  Money, time, and job situation are no object.  Name the place.  
San Diego.

Why San Diego?  
Sea World, of course.  Just kidding.  You never hear anything but good things, so why not try it out?

You can move anywhere on earth for six months.  Same deal.  Same place, or do you become an expat? 

September's typically when a lot of favorite TV shows return.  What new seasons are you looking forward to?   
Modern Family, Cougar Town (or whatever it's supposed new name will be), Glee, Biggest Loser.

Pretty sure this was my British lit professor.
You are going out tonight. You are going out to do whatever it is you would like to do for a fun night of festivity and frivolity. This can include anything from churning butter to fighting Steve Buscemi to falconing.  Anything goes.  You get to assemble your posse for the night. You can pick ANY FOUR MEN OR ANY FOUR WOMEN on the planet, friends, celebrities, athletes, etc. Who is in your entourage and why?
1) My best friend Shelley.  Shenanigans are always guaranteed when she and I get together.
2) Josh Charles, because he just seems cool in interviews.
3) Tina Fey.
4) Lindsay Lohan.  She can be "that girl" and anything stupid I do will look genius in comparison to anything she does.  And she'd give Tina some good material for jokes all night long.

Finally, Invisible Sam as the DD.  I figure I can throw him in and not have him count as a fifth since he is invisible.

I feel like Shelleys always bring shenanigans.  I feel like Dougs are always a buzzkill.  Also, girls with guys names (Blair, etc.) are often powderkegs, and Brittanys are attractive 99% of the time.  What one guy's name do you always means, "attractive dude" to you?  What one name is automatically repulsive? 
I applaud you for the Doug comment.  For your first question, I think I speak for all the ladies when I say...Fabio.  For your second, it's a toss up between Buford and Herbie.

(Editor's Note: I've never had a good Russ experience.  I've got a 100% success rate with Shannons.  And nobody named Blanche is under the age of 70.)

What is Invisible Sam?  
He's kind of my boyfriend.  He'll be at the next Chris Milam Memphis show.  Oh wait, he has a conflict that night and can't make it.  He sends his regrets.  Yes, I know that Chris currently doesn't have any Memphis dates set yet but trust me, Invisible Sam can't make it.  Weird....

(Editor's Note: What just happened here?)
(Chris's Note: I'm not sure.  Maybe it was snarky?)
(Editor's Note: Also, Chris does have some Memphis dates set.  Check the site for more details.)

The drink that's the taste of fall.  The ad that haunts my dreams.
Someone who looks like me once called Jack & Coke "the taste of fall."  What's your taste of fall?  
Hot chocolate.  Or a Vanilla Coke.

Where will music be in 5 years? What will be the next "big thing"? Where would you like to see it go?
Going strong.  I am guessing that kid from Ellen that apparently gave Justin Bieber a run for his money and stole his fans will be doing big things.  To infinity and beyond.

Finally, how can I ever thank you for the support?  
Lawn Boy for life.  Or at least the rest of this summer.  And maybe the next.  And half a turkey sandwich--I'm kind of hungry.

(Editor's Note: Lawn Boy For Life is now MY fantasy football team name.)

Done and done twice!  I only eat buffalo.

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